Premiership review 28th October

By tdf, October 30, 2006

Bolton v Man U

Only Nolan missing for Bolton…Ronaldo back on the right of midfield as Giggs continues on the opposite flank..
Jaskellainen only conceded one goal from open play so far this season.

All early possession and threat of breaking the deadlock from United…Giggs especially lively. Saha’s shot saved on the line by defender…
Rooney scores with a left foot drive after running onto intelligent through ball from Carrick…goal drought over 0-1.10’
Rooney grabs his second after collecting a loose ball, 25 yards out, picks his spot, cracks a beautiful curling drive just inside the post…0-2 16’
2t
Vidic- tough tackling. Carrick long ball finds Saha who runs at goal then squares for Ronaldo to score into an open net… 0-3 82’
Fletcher intercepts weak cross field pass, then sends Rooney through, who finishes with aggression past the impressive jaskelainen..0-4 82’

Man United were in scintillating form. Not just Rooney who scored a powerful hatrick to end his much publicized lean period. But every member of the team. They could have won this 0-10. Slick passing, crisp movement and arguably their best performance for a few years. Every one of Rooney’s goals smacked of class. The bullish Man U and England striker is approaching his 21st birthday this week, but his biggest smile will no doubt come from the satisfaction of regaining that brutal sharpness which makes him unstoppable. As the Bolton defence saw this afternoon. Vidic grows in stature with each outing and looks to be an astute signing by the Scot at the top.FT 0-4
MOM- SuperRooney. Back to his devastating best.

S United v Chelsea

Joe cole back for Blues.

J Cole injures Michael Tonge in first minute with stamp to his ankle. Sheffield bossing matters.
Drogba adjudged to have pulled down Hulse..definately NOT a penalty..no tackle or push…
Hilario saves the spot-kick, leaping quickly down to his left to paw the ball away to safety..Justice.
Lampard header saved from close range…Chelsea gaining prominence…
Long range free kick from Lampard swerves slightly but Paddy Kenny misjudges it and the ball flies straight past him…0-1 43’
2t
Deep cross from Lampard sets up Ballack for a header at the far post. 0-2 49’
Ref missed a blatant handball and allowed S united shot to be taken…shit ref.FT 0-2.

Comfortable for Mourinho. Noting spectacular but got the job done.
Paddy Kenny actually jumped away from the ball for Lampards free kick goal!!!

fast finding his head at premiership altitude, Ballack

Arsenal v Everton

Arteta corner met in the obx by super rat Cahill whose weak header falls onto his boot and rebounds past the static Lehman…0-1
Arteta nearly stomped by Gallas after hugging the frenchman then leaving his foot trailing over his chest…both booked for ‘afters’.
Henry close with well timed header..Rosicky drive reaches roof of the net..Rosicky close with outside of the right boot from 25 yards…Howard tips over Van Persie, hit from 18 yards..Henry header flashes past the post…. Van Persie scores delightful curling free kick from 22 yards out..keeper gets a touch but cant stop it nestling into the top corner…1-1 71′.

FT 1-1

Everton lucky to get away with a point. Arsenal continue to gel together as a team of ambitious young upstarts, but it is obviously going to take a while to get all the new cogs complementing each other as Asshole Wenger envisages…

Curled in a delightful equaliser,Robin Van Penis

Portsmouth v Reading

Kanu claims the opener with his 7th of the season…1-0 9’even though it was Gunnerson who elbowed the ball into his own net..not kanu’s goal..cheeky fucker…Benjani useless; two clear chances fluffed, once on a plate from Kanu and then his one-on-one with the keeper lob attempt. Sol Campbell steers a lofted volley pass to Kanu who gets a UK size 12 right boot on the ball to push it past Hammerman for 2-0 52’..that was definitely Kanu’s!
Mendes made it 3-0 with a perfectly executed volley from 189 yards out..his exocet smashing in off the post…
3-0 66’
The long range shooting of Mendes is consistently lethal.
Mendes handles a shot on the line then pushes it clear for throw…Doyle wins a 5 man scramble to poke home for 3-1…James had completely misjudged the trajectory of the cross!

FT 3-1

‘it was a stupid thing to do..really stupid..but they scored from the resulting corner so it was fair’-Mendes, in reference to his disgraceful handball which thwarted a certain goal.

Ben thatcher’s best mate, Sharp shooter Mendes

Liverpool v Villa

Carragher pumps one forward to big Sami Hyppia, the defender cushions the ball into the path of Dirk Kunt who brings it down via his chest before whipping a rasping shot past the keeper for 1-0 31’
Crouch scores with a first time shot from 15 yards past sorrowful Sorenson..2-0
Flowing Liverpool passing move ends with Garcia slotting the third goal for his team, under the flaccid frame of Sorenson…3-0 44’
Villa pull one back through Agbonalhor with clever drive past Reina .3-1.(set up by Chris Sutton.)

FT 3-1

Villa poor. Liverpool rampant.

Spanish sleazeball, Luis’prettyboy’Garcia

Watford v Spurs

Watford dominating….Shittu’s delicate pullback skied 50 yards over by Tommy smith from close range..
Lennon twice denied by Watford’s England keeper, Foster…Ashley Young wrongly judged guilty on offside charges, after he was clean through and scored past Robinson…bad decision.
Foster foils Lennon again after the youngster had burst between two defenders to find space for the strike…FT 0-0
MOM– Foster.
Watford played to their maximum but didn’t have the rub of the green..

The future England number one, Ben Foster of Watford.

Newcastle v Charlton

Carson smacked in the head by Rossi’s knee…sporting sympathetic reaction from the Italian.
Rossi close with volley, onto the bar after Duff had made the chance…FT 0-0

MOM Scott Carson…he earned the point for Charlton.

Fulham v Wigan

Wigan had been pushing hard and earned the penalty when Zat Knight handballed on the line.,..Penalty struck the bar!!! Fulham asleep.
Mistake from Zat Knight allowed Cammarra to run through and clip a shot past Niemi for 0-1…

FT 0-1

Well deserved victory for Jewell and his well trained hyenas..lackluster Fulham.