We MUST still dream./even in our wakefulness.

By tdf, January 26, 2023

I have a dream.

Too Long clinged to.

It has been offered and savaged.

It has been revealed and broken.

by me and the succulence living dead,

I have been broken.

Dashed against the rocks repeatedly,

somehow survived,

no matter how I grit my fangs,

to collect what is left of me after giving everything,

the final soldier on that battlefield,

enemy retreating,

and I am close to dead,

yet raising my shoulder…gurgling blood…

‘come back, kill me again’

as even then,

I cannot accept that anyone I have given my poison bambi love to,

wants to hurt me…

That dream has gone.


I developed instinct when younger, i sought to feel really alive, and maybe a little through circumstance, a little rugged a realm to grow up in, and tumult when a toddler etc…but I learned as I grew, whilst the less ‘normal’ were often savage dangerous, volatile,  instinctive, they always meant what they did and expressed, and being near them, i was drawn to them…more than the others at school who were pleasant, but more tame. less alive…so i have carried that on, ever seeking that pure and wild loyalty or horror…

society teaches us that those who are not of the commonl script, ‘Friends’ behaviour, are weird, and bad…they are pushed to the periphery, hounded away as outcasts, become outlaws, heretics…and yet they are grasping at life, every moment they can, not mentalists, just not like the herd….they mean what they express…its partly why I am in awe of ninja sister, she is incredibly both alive and resilient, sure…a little damaged, a little wild, but she exists in every moment, with such mega vibrancy! And is VITAL to be around (most the time! hohoho) even inspiring.

I come from more vivid living, and I think/hope you realise its not me knocking melbourne, as I sometimes do, its just that here is more lacking passion and spirit, a zest for life, adventure, magic! And yes yes, of course, chasing bliss and the true depth of our capacity to feel and love also leads to the chance we we will find the opposite extremes of existence, cant have one without the other, so I understand why many seek the middle ground.

“totally sick of all the creeps and losers and weirdos…but those are our people”....they are my people.

Few and far between.

Near and far. Still left and found of such souls,

for they move beyond and apart of the mainstream,

seek the familiar ferals,

yet when finding anyone willing to truly escape,

they vanish…head to the trees and vallleys and ocean,

to wherever the symphony of the wilderness is far louder,

than the machine and manufactured,

Let us move to more real>>>>

Those few who have delved deep, scribble their way out the depths plumbed…..

none of them are preaching STAY HUMAN!

I prefer…STAY ANIMAL

 

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