I am weird, because I am honest.
cringing at myself for bowing to slick prick brutes in suits,
for holding my tongue around women with radars wide open seeking ANYTHING Society considers ‘inappropriate’…
Those who know me dearly and awfully,
who have long accommodated my sporadic spastic,
yet immense investment of ROMEO outside of a novel that can be closed and forgotten,
are well aware,
of my HONESTY dancing between righteous,
and brutish brazen.
ALL who have my love,
CAN TRUST ME…for good and ill.
I am drawn to the ocean,
even during the Winter,
splash the shallows upon my brow,
feel some connection to the nature that is within me,
and never feel so beautifully consumed to magical sensual embrace of the wilderness,
as when I can wade in deep,
remove and leave on the shoreline my humanity,
and bask in the starlight and calm marvel of the shapes of clouds,
the sense of naked weightlessness,
as the lunar goddess conductress,
flows around and within and through me,
always so gorgeous when this particular goddess is in full bloom,
and the waves are wild and fierce,
and to throw myself IN IN IN,
be lifted and rolled and thrown and rolled back to the sand!
It doesnt scare or worry,
it adds wind to the sails of my perceived primal desire,
to howl and dive deep into the chaotic Lunar symphony,
for to feel the MOON…
is something so special,’beyond words….
I return to the land a creature more animal than human,
seeking anything of the same pulse born of the wind and blizzards >>>>
I am forced to quickly become human,
my soul slows and narrows even when finding gems in the mega rough,
as the spirit has not changed,
it has communed with crabs and manta rays,
and when back on terra firma,
it is lost and rabid,
more easily animated by the vodka and anything close to my homosapien tribe,
not ‘dissenting’ or promoting themselves in organised ‘protests’,
seeking the heart symbols on fuckbook,
it is enlivened by coming across others whose spirits registers as real and feral,
others born out of their species,
kinship of their values,
whose every expression is an affront to the many here and near and dear>>>
And yet, looking briefly back upon the above…
I feel the need to assert what I am,
what I seek,
what I feel beyond a reaction to the many I am surrounded by…
And it shouldn’t make me seem less human, than it does…
I revere Butterflies beyond all humans,
they mean no harm and are so beautiful and perfect,
in how they look and move.
I prefer rats to most humans,
as they mean me no harm,
just seem to eat and survive.
I wish I could speak butterfly and wombat and fish,
and breathe for longer underwater,
and fly a little with borrowed wings to feel the flow of a flock moving in such mesmerising motion,
in that nether realm,
between where I am grounded and the clouds…
We have long gone so wrong that the many can never reach far enough,
in head or heart or instinct,
to feel kinship to the possums or bees,
long programmed to assume we are ABOVE all of them,
when the many of US,
behave exactly the same as those lesser beings.
Barely different from blades of grass….
I know more dogs with unique character than homosapiens…
And the worst of it,
of the programming and broken synapse connections to the wilderness within,
is that most find our herded,
frog march of vapid obedience to the overseers seeking POWER,
as not just palatable,
but to defend!
I WILL FIGHT YOU TO THE DEATH TO PROTECT MY 50 INCH HD TV!!!!
Even the young I find so worryingly,
somehow a semblance of tribe,
jolly and playful,
soon find the same horror of the trademark ancestral homosaps…
all this wailing of the world of humanity,
if I cannot learn to run wild with the wolves,
or breathe long enough under water to seek kinship with the seals and parrot fish,
then I must seek an escape to write poetry of neptunian goddesses>>>
Or…seek the nearest to the ends of our potential in experience,
if accepting I am trapped here on Earth.