England v Macedonia

By tdf, October 7, 2006

England v Macedonia

Though we struggled to find the winning goal in the recent reverse of this fixture (vs Macedonia, A, Sep 6th) our opponents on that occasion never really looked capable of doing more than stifling and containing the England team. Admittedly the Macedonians proved a hard nut to crack but we could and should have won that game more comfortably than the 0-1 score line suggests. Now, after a month of typically frenetic premiership and European action, the majority of England’s players have had a chance to find their match rhythm and touch, which should- especially when we add in the comfort of home advantage- translate into a considerably more impressive performance and result.

Continuity, rather than experimentation, appears a key concept of the Mclaren/Venables era. For the injured Hargreaves, Michael Carrick will arrive as the anchor man in midfield, and crocked Andy Johnson’s bench-warming responsibilities will fall to Darren Bent. Despite various reports pointing towards an adventurous 3-5-2 formation, the reality of the England line-up will no doubt be our traditional 4-4-2. And I guess that despite the lackluster, overly rigid efforts in our last international outing, we can’t forget that we did win that game, and have won the last 3 in a row, scoring 10 goals in the process while conceding none. So why change?

For me and every other football purist amongst the English support, the major source of hope for excitement is the return to the national first team of none other than the boy wonder: Wayne Rooney. Only a blindly nationalistic patriot could predict with any semblance of certainty that the Toxteth terror will dazzle with stardust from the first whistle to the last head butt of this match. Because unfortunately, these last few weeks have been arguably the most depressing of the young striker’s career. For any other 20 year old a run of only one goal in 6 league outings wouldn’t weigh as heavy on the national conscience. But we are talking about the player who since arriving on the scene as a feisty 16 year old toffee, has shown more promise than any English player since…Since is the wrong word, unless I am jumping on the back of older football fans who witnessed the early days of Keegan, Charlton, Edwards and Julian Dicks. Suffice to say, Wayne Rooney has already displayed the most advanced levels of technique, explosive scoring, awareness, and all round natural talent, that I have personally ever seen in an Englishman. He has, at the best of times, reminded me of a youthful Ronaldo, a chubbier, grittier Roberto Baggio, a un-natural combination of Van Basten and Goebbels. Still, I am getting carried away as I usually do when the topic of my writing turns to Mr. Rooney. Back to the here and now…
…His form of late has been poor. Perhaps the infamous world-cup incident involving his Man United team-mate, international fluffer, Christiano Ronaldo, has affected him as many of us predicted it would, i.e. bitterly. Perhaps the ludicrously upheld (by the English FA)3 game suspension, carried over from a pre-season friendly red card has upset his internal balance. Or maybe he simply needs more match-time to regain his sharpness and hunger. I watched him huff and puff on the Man United left wing, in the game against Benfica. A game in which C.Ronaldo was given his usual free reign to roam almost without restraint. That was an average night for the Mancunians but an exceptionally poor night for Wayne, who looked a shadow of his usual boisterous, world class self. There is obviously some form of pressure weighing down on the shoulders of the troubled demi-god.
This will be his first match for England since the red card instigated by C.Ronaldo, and at least we may be able to rule out the Portuguese Factor from his slump at 6.45pm this evening. Playing off Crouchy will suit Rooney’s game and I have high but realistic hopes of seeing him break free of these possibly self imposed mental shackles and ‘explode’ into his true Self as team manager, Mclaren, predicted in the press conference this morning.

Robinson between the sticks is a reliable distributor and often a world class shot stopper. The defence of Gary ‘Lurch’ Neville, John Terry, Rio Ferdinand and Ashley Cole, should prove far too stern a challenge for the Macedonians to muster any serious efforts on goal. Stevie Gerrard will always threaten from the right wing berth, while on the opposite flank, Mclaren’s bastard son, Stuart Downing, offers a sporadically dependable left boot and the chance of penetration down the wing. It is the central midfield pairing which bothers me. Owen Hargreaves has been nothing short of a revelation over the last few English games, and his prominence for the side appears to grow with every extra minute he is on the field wearing the 3 lions proudly across his German heart. But as mentioned earlier, Hargreaves is injured.

Carrick-Lovely chap, but too nice for the Hatchetman role.

Michael Carrick may have cost Alex Ferguson a bionic arm and leg, but if he was purchased with the intention of replacing one of the finest anchormen of the last decade, Roy ‘I will eat your kids’ Keane, then I fear Fergie is now showing signs of mental deterioration and suspect judgement. Carrick is a long ball player, who isn’t particularly mobile and most worryingly for me, he blatantly lacks bite. Paul Scholes has been pulled back to help out the defence in every game he has played for United this term, and I suspect that the same job will be required of Lampard in this game. Carrick is not in the same class as Hargreaves, as Gattusso, Deschamps, Viera, Makelele. And against better international teams, he will be found lacking. Still, the opponents today are Macedonia, not France or Italy. Neither Lampard or Carrick have the tenacity required to play the anchorman role. Between them perhaps, they can share the responsibilities of protecting the centre-backs, but this will result in predictable flank attacks from the constantly misfiring Downing and reliably exceptional talent of Gerrard. However, with Crouch playing the tower of previously unimaginable tangents as point man, Rooney will be able to drop deep to pick up the ball from a more central role. Which is more the job for which he was designed by the Gods originally.

As for the Macedonians, I must concede to having purchased the left footed Pandev on Pro Evo 5, in my first season of the master league. Lacking killer pace, the attacking midfielder/striker knows where the goal is. Also the name Sakiri seems to ring a bell or two in my mind…does he have a twin brother????

We should win this. Comfortably. 3-0 or more would be satisfactory. Anything else and I will be screaming like a drunk, thoroughly deranged, wench for the balls of Mclaren on my chopping board.

Good luck Wayne!

Anthem watch
Shirley Keane sings. Poorly.

Gary Neville solemn. Everyone else sings passionately, but not Downing who looks as happy as a rent boy at a lesbian-only party.

King replaces Rio.

Ref Watch- Markus Merk- German
‘one of the best in Europe’- Motson.
1T
Cool weather…fine playing conditions, old Trafford pitch.

4- Rooney shows deft touch bringing down a 30 yard pass from Gerrard. Almost puts Crouchy in.

8- Neville interception releases Gerrard whose high velocity cross aimed at Rooney is defended.

11- Pandev finds his way into the box, turns King but the angle is too acute and his shot hits the side netting…well blocked out.

15- Rooney wins ball fair and square but Macedonian defender makes a feast of falling over Rooney’s neck and then needs ‘treatment’. Cheat.

25- solid challenge from King affords Mac their first corner>
Cleared by the tallest man in Europe, Crouchy.

Scrappy. When we are getting down the flanks, the service into the box has been poor. Missing Beckham.

Gerrard appearing wide left…Even his usually accurate passing skills are absent.

37- Petrov volleys one from 15 yards out…could of gone anywhere but thankfully it was a wild effort which flashed well wide of goal.

39- Neville forced to head ball out for a corner after Pandev lurks as the far post…

44- Namuowski down again…terrible faking of injury. Well practised limp. Dickhead. Should be banned or shot.

What we are lacking is David Beckham. A player capable of picking out a pass and delivering the ball with pin point accuracy. Whenever we have made inroads down the flanks the crosses into the box have been pathetic, way below standard. As our game plan is completely focussed on the wingers producing high balls into the box, if that service is weak then our forwards simply don’t get the chances. In all honesty, Macedonia have looked more lively and more fluid as an attacking unit. Terribly depressing. But sadly typical of the England team of recent history. Rooney has looked sharper than in recent domestic performances but still lacking his killer instinct and bereft of the options around him needed to pounce on and create something magical. Gerrard is off his game which isn’t helping matters and Lampard has managed to find himself with the ball at his feet, in the opponents box on only one occasion, a chance he wasted. Pandev is the best player on the pitch.

2T
47- Gerrard chomped wide right. YELLOW for Petrov.
Downing floats one in, Lampard gets something on it, keeper deflects the ball for a corner…
Good pressure from England.

49- Pandev brought down by Gerrard for lunge. YELLOW..he will miss the Croatia game.FK in dangerous position for MAC.>>>
50->>charged down by King.

55- Metreski goes close with a header from 8 yards out…Is Terry injured??

56- Robinson blocks close rang effort from acute angle..corner kick…

58- Downing pumps one into the box..Crouch heads, saved by keeper, and Neville blasts the rebound just over he bar from 6 yards out with the goal gaping!

Time for a change??? Although the game is coming to life more for England..perhaps Defoe for Downing and switch for 4-3-3.

60- Crouch finally wins a free kick in a promising position.35 yards out, central..
>>>FK>>61>>Lampard>>laid off to Gerrard whose shot is putrid.

Gerrard should be subbed for Wright Phillips or Defoe.

64- Cole finds Crouch but his header is weak and wide.

66- Rooney found in the area, poor first touch but makes room for shot which is well saved for a corner…
>>Downing>defended.
68- Crouchy gives the ball away cheaply which sets up 2 on 2 attack for MAC ..Cole defends well to make the ball safe.

Carrick has been anonymous.

69- Counter attack results in fast ball played into Crouch who misses , but the cross falls to Downing whose shot is worse than wayward, it is embarrassing.

70- SUB Disastrous Downing off for Wright Phillips.

72- Cole clears from a yard off the line after Nemeski found himself in the area and in space to shoot past Robinson…

75- SUB Rooney for Defoe, who is 24 today…

77- MAC player down, faking after great tackle by King. Crouch fell out with the opposition, then the game was stopped by ref.

4-4-2 hasn’t worked at all against the lively 3-5-2 of Macedonia. We are missing Beckham and playing the wrong formation. All our movement is predictable.

81- Tame shot by Lampard drifts 20 yards wide of goal.

82- Crouch brings ball down , turns and shoots but drags the effort wide…

83- SUB Pandev off for Tasevski. Pandev has looked quality.

85- Wright Phillips dummies past 2 defenders, then lays the ball off to Gerrard who shot from distance, hits the bar!

89-Crouch is found in 15 yard box, brings ball down but shoots into the ground when he should have crossed..saved for corner>>>

92- King drifts a cross onto the head of Crouch whose header is sent 10 yards wide…

Mclaren, guilty of treason?
Why must I always begin a final analysis of an England performance with a sentence containing the words heartless, disorganized and terrible? So often I hear the Premiership spoken about as if it represents the pinnacle of world football, and now and then I have almost agreed with that sentiment. But now, after enduring yet another dejected, lifeless, in cohesive, toothless, anaemic English showing, in front of our home supporters, against a team with only one player of any celebrity or apparent class, I am struggling to find anything to be proud of in the English game. It cannot be said that Macedonia played ultra defensive football, because for large sections of this match, they adopted a three pronged attack, which troubled the English defence more regularly than Rooney and Crouch managed to concern the well drilled central trio of Macedonian defenders. Ledley King is the only player to come out of this encounter with any credit, slotting in well alongside the strangely quiet John Terry. Gary Neville missed an absolute sitter which should have put us one up, while the other fullback, Ashley Cole, proved useless at delivering the ball from the wings every time he got into a good position. Michael Carrick was a virtual spectator for much of the ninety minutes and it was a mistake to have left the long-ball specialist on the pitch when an in form tiger like Scott Parker was bearing his teeth in anticipation on the bench. The other central midfielder, Lampard, played as he always does for England; shit. He is simply unable to make the step up to international level, which is a shame, but what is more shameful is his continual inclusion in the starting XI. Even Steven Gerard, who is usually outstanding at any level, was pathetic today; misplacing passes, buying dummies left right and centre instead of selling them, and if it wasn’t for his late shot which hit the bar, this would have been his worst performance in an England shirt. The left winger, Downing, was as expected, woefully petrified. He showed a complete lack of class whenever given the chance to move forward. Crouch missed a few half chances that on a better day he may have put away, and his strike partner, Rooney was still missing that magical spark we all know that he has. Somewhere!

It is difficult to blame the two strikers for failing to capitalize on the few half chances they had because the service to them was generally awful. The manager had instructed the team to relentlessly pump crosses into the box, but the distribution of ALL his charges was embarrassing. Bearing in mind that we are trying to play a system in which the forwards thrive on accurate passes from the wings, and from deep, why oh fucking why does Mclaren continue to leave one of the greatest ball-players of modern football, not just out of the starting eleven but out of the squad as a whole. I don’t understand why Beckham isn’t even getting a look-in when he is still capable of pissing in a pint glass from 50 yards away. To be more serious, David Beckham is the best English passer, and it an extreme act of treason for Mclaren to be omitting him from a system which requires a man of his very skills. He doesn’t have to be captain, he doesn’t even need a starring role. But for fucks sake, bring him back into the fold, before it is too late. Yes we may scrape through the group by playing shit football, but if 4-4-2 is the name of our game, and we rely solely on Gerrard for supplying the ammunition, we will get stomped in the EURO finals by any of the proper teams. All credit to Macedonia; they outplayed us for much of this encounter and could even feel slightly aggrieved at not taking all 3 points.

Beckham- Please come home…

As for possible solutions to our very obvious problems, I would suggest David Beckham back in his right midfield slot with orders to do nothing but cross, cross cross, until his legs stop working due to fatigue or breakage. Lampard needs to be dropped, even if only to try shake him out of the pallid demeanour he adopts whenever he plays for his country. It would be interesting to see Andy Johnson working up front with Rooney. The Everton front man would bring a more insidious threat to our attacking options. I really can’t stand Carrick or Downing; they are both too worthless to represent their country at this level. Perhaps in the future that may change. But we need proven quality now, not Maybes.